I recently had a conversation with a man who I believed to be a liar. Rather than telling the guy that I thought he was a liar, I sat and talked with him. I asked myself, “What if I allowed this to be true?” The part of me that wants to trust, that wants to allow the best possible outcome at all times asked, “What if it’s true? What if you allow this to actually be happening exactly the way it is?” I went with it. I decided that just for the moment I would pretend that what he said was true. I would worry about the rest later. Wow! What a difference that made. I had a wonderful night. I silenced the critic for a moment and had fun.
It reminds me of my favorite quote, “If you believe you are happy, you are.” In the moment, when you are experiencing happiness, you ARE happy, just as when you are experiencing anger, you ARE angry.
I was in relationship where I experienced these moments often. As long as I believed the lie, it was true for me. I believed the lie repeatedly and for long periods of time because it seemed easier, because I wanted to allow the best possible outcome.
That simple choice brought us many days of extreme happiness. We had some great moments as a family and as a couple. But this was only sustainable as long as we all believed in the vision of the lie. We all had to ignore the truth in order to maintain the lie.
The truth is not necessarily the easiest path but is the easiest path to sustain. Think about the lies we tell ourselves, that we are inadequate, that we need more, that life is hard, that we are not worthy. This is painful. It hurts, even if you tell yourself that you accept yourself for the less than perfect being that you are, it does not feel good. The lie is difficult to maintain.
The truth is that we are brilliant, that we are perfection, beauty and love. This is the only thing that is true and it is sustainable. It feels good, it feels beautiful and it is our innate state of being. We are always enough, we are always perfect. The truth is our right and the truth is that we are love.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Another Name For God
This came to me after reading a post asking, Who Named God.
My name is Kristy. This is what most people call me but my Dad calls me Krizmo and my Grandpa called me Krystalina. My daughter calls me Mommy or sometimes Mama. My ex has a name for me that he is wise enough to only use when I can’t hear. For each of these people I am my version of who they need me to be. For my Father, I am a daughter, for my daughter I am a mother and at any moment, I am still exactly who I am. It really doesn’t matter what I am called or the role that I am playing for someone. I am both savior to my daughter and villain to her father. I am still me.
God is still God, or Source, or Goddess or Universe, Spirit, Jesus, etc. The role that God play in our lives changes as our relationships get more complex. Before I knew God’s truth I looked at God as a stranger, then an acquaintance, someone I may have drawn conclusions about. Later, I found a trusted friend, my sounding board, confidant and guide. Then, when I truly began to understand the vastness of true, pure love that God is, it was as if I were an obsessed lover, clinging to the moments of grace that blessed my life. Clinging to these moments of greatness and waiting impatiently for the next.
Later-Now, I’ve come to recognize that God’s pure bliss and joy are everywhere. Every moment is a moment of grace and my relationship with God has transformed again. Now I know that God is everything. God is me. Kristy is another name for God.
Like someone that I’ve been married to for the past 36 years, it is simple yet complex. Comfortable yet still there is work to be done. Love to be tended to and maintained yet easy, or at least easier. Our relationship has evolved to the point that I still recognize my ability to be separate but choose not to be.
My name is Kristy. This is what most people call me but my Dad calls me Krizmo and my Grandpa called me Krystalina. My daughter calls me Mommy or sometimes Mama. My ex has a name for me that he is wise enough to only use when I can’t hear. For each of these people I am my version of who they need me to be. For my Father, I am a daughter, for my daughter I am a mother and at any moment, I am still exactly who I am. It really doesn’t matter what I am called or the role that I am playing for someone. I am both savior to my daughter and villain to her father. I am still me.
God is still God, or Source, or Goddess or Universe, Spirit, Jesus, etc. The role that God play in our lives changes as our relationships get more complex. Before I knew God’s truth I looked at God as a stranger, then an acquaintance, someone I may have drawn conclusions about. Later, I found a trusted friend, my sounding board, confidant and guide. Then, when I truly began to understand the vastness of true, pure love that God is, it was as if I were an obsessed lover, clinging to the moments of grace that blessed my life. Clinging to these moments of greatness and waiting impatiently for the next.
Later-Now, I’ve come to recognize that God’s pure bliss and joy are everywhere. Every moment is a moment of grace and my relationship with God has transformed again. Now I know that God is everything. God is me. Kristy is another name for God.
Like someone that I’ve been married to for the past 36 years, it is simple yet complex. Comfortable yet still there is work to be done. Love to be tended to and maintained yet easy, or at least easier. Our relationship has evolved to the point that I still recognize my ability to be separate but choose not to be.
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